fear & love II

Love is not fearful, its the thought of losing it .. which makes loving confusing and fearful.

Love should be wonderful .. well, we all hope but sometimes, some unforseen circumstances do happen.

Love used to be so wonderful to me. Love is so mysterious yet simple. how bout you?

there are thousand and one explaination as to what love is, how falling love is like and being in love is the most wonderful feeling on earth.

some people say, to be able to be loved is the most magical thing that could happen to someone. all he/she need to do is to open up their hand and embrace love, and taking in more love by someone who is so deeply in love with them.

how wonderful isnt it?

well, maybe i have second thoughts about that.

to love someone is also wonderful.
to be able to sacrified for someone you loved. to share her/his deepest thoughts. to stand by her/he when in difficult moments and carry all her/his burden. to be able to be there, holding her/his hand telling her/him they are fine. when in time of good, bad, difficult or wonderful moments.

and telling them i will always be by your side.

isnt this more wonderful than just being loved? and being like a love parasite? well, perhaps maybe.

so would you rather be loved or to loved?

what if one day the one you loved most say goodbye to you and just leave you?

there are again one thousand and one reasons to say goodbye. maybe 20% are what we call reasons and the remaining 80% are what we call excuses.

so are they selfish? are they?

it's just like coming to a cross-road junction, and they just let go of your hand and run towards north and never coming back, and you are still at the cross-road?

you really love him/her and they do this to you. are you angry or sad or probably disappointed and don't know what to do b'cos you're still confused and in a daze.

well, you never expected it .. isnt it?

is this fear?
fear of losing something you love so much yet he/she left you in a hurry with no explaination.
or is there a need of one actually?

will you yearn for her/his return one day? will you??
maybe time will tell .. its always a big question mark.

will you be sad if one day you saw her/him again and the one beside her/she is not you? you would probably thought .. last year wasnt like that. and why now?
why she/he do this to me?

are you the saddest person on planet earth? are you one?

some people would move on and some maybe still linger in the past. there are some questions we can always ask ourselves but yet will never be solved.

however, there should be no fear in love .. well, maybe thats what i believe.

but the thought of losing love creates fear, bcos deep down our heart we know we wouldnt want some unforseen circumstances to come true. why? bcos we treasure them. and losing it hurts.

well, isnt it? true .. ?

bcos for me, regardless of the fear, i still prefer to love someone. instead of be loved, though losing it maybe very a very terrible and unthinkable feeling again.
but seeing the one i love is happy, seeing her million dollar laughing portrait, is something money can never buy.

just the thought of waiting for the girl i love most to come dispel all fear in love.
bcos fear doesnt exist in my love.

finally ..

love is like a game, everyone follow the simple rule of to loved or to be loved. the rewards are damn sweet and the punishment could be very harsh. love game is a repetition, but it doesnt mean you need to play this game several times to be an expert in it.

frankly i suck in it .. and perhaps you don't ..

anyway, to all people in love .. good luck!